What Kind of Ceremony
Have you decided where you are going to get married and what kind of ceremony you would like?
There are all sorts of places you can get married in these days. Of course there is the traditional church wedding and the register office wedding but now you can go abroad or hold your wedding in a castle, a stately home or by the sea with the waves around you.
There are also civil partnerships as well.
There are rules and regulations which must be followed regardless of the place you choose.
Firstly are you free to marry, if this is not your first wedding has your previous marriage been dissolved.
A civil marriage ceremony can take place in any register office in England or Wales, or at any place that has been approved to hold a civil marriage. These include stately homes, hotels, certain buildings and even restaurants.
Within England and Wales, the ceremony must tale place between the hours of 8am and 6pm, the only exceptions being for Jewish and Quaker ceremonies. Within Scotland, no such time-of-day restrictions are in place.
Who must be present?
In order to make the marriage legally binding, it must be attended by two witnesses, although it is perfectly possible to have more than 2 signing. The witnesses should be personally known to the Bride and/or Groom, but couples are more than welcome to use witnesses off the street - people that they have never met before! There are no laws concerning the age of marriage witnesses, other than that they need to be old enough to function properly as a witness.
But at the end of the day the most important thing is to have the wedding as you want it. Don’t let others influence your decisions and lastly ENJOY it.
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The Role of the Bridesmaid.
Tradition has it that all bridesmaids are unmarried. They are there to help the bride through her wedding day with as little stress and anxiety as possible.
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Wedding Speeches
Traditionally three people give speeches at weddings, the father of the bride, the bridegroom and last, the best man. Nowadays some brides like to give a speech as well. Remember you can make your speeches witty but please don’t embarrass any of your guests and don’t make your time on your feet too long.
The best man normally acts as a Master of Ceremonies and starts the proceedings off by introducing the bride’s father.
Fathers Speech
Traditionally the Father of the Bride welcomes everyone to the wedding and the groom's parents into the family. He will say how beautiful his daughter, the bride looks. He will most likely then tell a story about her. Next he normally welcomes the groom to be his son in law and tells him what he is letting himself into. He may thank the vicar, caterers and anyone else who has helped with the day. Then lastly he will propose a toast for the bride and groom.
The best man will then introduce the groom to make his speech.
Grooms Speech
The groom will thank friends and family who have in some way made the day special and he will also thank his mother and father in law for allowing him to marry their daughter. He will then go on and probably say how he met his wife, you may tell a joke or two here and then he will be complimentary about his new bride. He will go on to thank his best man for doing a good job and he may take this opportunity to speak about his best man. Then he will propose a toast to the bridesmaids.
Some grooms then go on to present both mothers with a present, normally flowers and the bridesmaids with a gift as well.
The groom then introduces the best man.
Best man speech
The best man will start by thanking the groom for asking him to be his best man. He will then relate tales of the past about the groom and maybe even the bride if he knows her and he is bound to say something about the stag night.
Prior to the speeches he will have had the opportunity to look at some of the wedding cards and he will choose a few of these to read out. These are normally from people who have not been able to come to the wedding. The thing is to make this brief as otherwise he will lose the interest of his audience.
Finally he will ask everyone to stand and propose a final toast to the bride and groom wishing them all the best for their new life together.
Bride's speech
Traditionally the bride does not make a speech but today’s brides like to be equal and so a few of them do. She will have to decide whereabouts in the speeches she would like to speak. This speech will probably be quite short and consist of thanking everyone and any special words she has for her new husband.
If there is no master of ceremonies the best man will need to introduce the next item - cutting of the cake - or thank the audience and invite them to carry on with enjoying themselves.
There are a number of books which will help you with these speeches.
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Who Sits Where?
This is always a difficult one, Uncle Bill won’t sit with Auntie Mary and so on. Remember this is YOUR wedding so don’t get stressed.
Firstly there are some seating arrangements that have traditionally been done for years. The bride and groom sit in the middle of the top table, The Bride should always be at the left side of the Bridegroom. So, the table should go -Chief Bridesmaid, Bridegroom’s Mother, Bride’s Father, Bride, Bridegroom, Bride’s Mother, Bridegroom’s Father and Best Man – this is from the left facing your guests. Then decide what kind of room your reception is taking place in. Will there be round tables or two or three long tables connecting to the top table. Ideally your bridesmaids will be near the top table. Now the fun starts, decide on who sits with who. Close family normally sit near to the top table, if you know that two people don’t get on then don’t put them on the same table or if you have a divorced couple it is better to sit them apart. If there are children present, it is always advisable to sit them with their parents, you don’t want a food fight on your hands. Mixing both sides of the family helps to get everyone talking. Remember, try to be sensitive when planning the tables and things will work out just fine. When you have made your final arrangements write out name cards and a plan and give it to your caterers.
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